I am not a full-time writer. Truth be told, most days I’m not even a part-time writer. Most days I’m a writer trapped in a full-time employee’s body. Most days by the time I get home from work I can’t imagine turning on my computer. I can’t imagine doing anything other than stare at Youtube.
Catch me on a good day, maybe a Sunday right after church, and I would say yes. I would yell yes! I would shout it from the rooftops. But when I think about my full-time responsibilities: my job, my son, our bills, I know I can’t let go to grow. We have to eat. I can’t chase my dreams with the determination and singular focus of the entrepreneurs who run the podcasts I listen to or bake the cupcakes I treat myself to once a month. Right now I can’t afford it.
However, while I will continue to spend precious writing time volunteering at my church and helping my entrepreneur friends; while I will continue to devote as much time as I can to my wonderful, brilliant son, I will also commit to letting go of my comfort zone. I will let go of my fears. I will lose a little sleep.
Maybe I can’t let go in the same way other women can, but I can move at God’s speed. I can stay in sync with the flow of His Spirit and leadership. I will do what I can today and look forward to the work I CAN do tomorrow.
I will let go of my fears and leap a little at a time.